Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
NoShamevember. You game?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
