That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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