how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
