Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
