Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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