Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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