I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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