I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize