We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
