i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize