areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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