Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
