I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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