Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize