I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I will be naked everywhere
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
