doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize