she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
