why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
