I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
