After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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