i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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