she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
