I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Man, jail baloney is awful.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian