i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
