OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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