non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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