Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
