Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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