BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
