I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
