in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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