Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
