i barfeds in our rink
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
