i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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