im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower