Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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