Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I CAN MOONWALK!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
it glows. i had to have it.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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