I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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