I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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