ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
