first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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