I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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