I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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