Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
