ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
