butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
