he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
