TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I don't think brook has ever known best
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
