He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
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I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
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may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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