I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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