Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize