She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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