I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
