No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
